Fapping to Foxes

"Rock Bottom" (rockbottom81) 01/23/2015 at 13:07 • Filed to: None

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For those of us over 30 (well over, in some cases), the Ford Fox Body was more than just the Five-Oh. Sure, the Mustang was the most loved and remembered of the Fox machines, but I would like to draw attention to my personal favorites: The Fairmont Futura and the first Thunderbird Turbo Coupe.

Oh sure, I think the Fox-stang was a fine car that was, and still is, a fantastic performance bargain. Never mind the whole "turn the steering wheel right 45 degrees with every heavy throttle application" part. It was light-ish and more modern feeling than it's younger buddies over at GM. And I thoroughly enjoy looking at a clean 87 to 88 Turbo coupe, with it's NACA-esque scoops in the hood and ultra sleek closed grille. So swoopy! At the end of the day, the Futura and early Turbo Coupe just look right.

Maybe it's a familiarization thing. My father bought a brand new 1984 Turbo Coupe when I was a wee young'en. I can still remember the smell of the tan leather, the little hand pumps for the pneumatic lumbar support, the leaky moon roof, the Mustang Turbine wheels he installed some time in the late 80s, the aftermarket fog lights (Cibies or Sev Marchals or something like that), and that annoying buzzzZZZZZ of the overboost warning. You Turbo Coupe guys know that buzzzzz. I was about 12 when he traded it in on a brand new 1992 SHO, which broke my inner Jalop's heart. Dad's car was no longer that sinister, black, low, long, loud turbocharged monster with an oil filled boost gauge strapped to the steering column. Now dad's car looked like grandma's Sable, but with three pedals.

And then there's the Futura. I've only known one person who had a Fairmont (not a Futura, sadly) and it was a miserable machine by all accounts. His was a carb'd 2.3 with a four speed and allegedly had SERIOUS trouble running with 75mph freeway traffic. But every time I went to a blue-collar cruise-in night in late-90s Detroit, there would be several Futuras, usually with 5.0 swaps, Mickey Thompsons, and shining paint. I loved that sloped rear window and ultra-upright nose. The impossibly thin A-pillars and the velour seats. I loved how downright malaise a car could be while looking right and running 13s.

Below: A very typical sight at the cruise-in nights of my formative years.

Below: Fairly average Fairmont behavior in the high school parking lot.

Below: This car is pretty much identical to the car I rode around in as a dumb kid.

Below: The swoopy "Aero Bird" lines are obvious here. NASCAR, baby!

DancesWithRotors - Driving Insightfully > Rock Bottom 01/23/2015 at 13:55

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I'd argue that the best Fox was the Fairmont wagon. Seriously, how can you not love this?

Also, don't forget the Fox-body Marquis wagon...

Rock Bottom > DancesWithRotors - Driving Insightfully 01/23/2015 at 13:56

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Oh yeah, I forgot about the Marquis and LTD! Those were great!

DancesWithRotors - Driving Insightfully > Rock Bottom 01/23/2015 at 13:59

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I'd forgotten about them, but there's a white Marquis sedan that I've seen while walking out to my car, after work.. They're seriously good looking old cars, IMHO.

Rock Bottom > DancesWithRotors - Driving Insightfully 01/23/2015 at 14:03

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I forgot that a buddy of mine had a sedan in high school (mid 90s). It was maroon, 3.8, and tragically beat. I mean, we were shocked every day that car made it to school!

Luc - The Acadian Oppo > Rock Bottom 01/23/2015 at 16:19

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I'm turning 30 next month and I've always had a strong love for foxes.

The mustang LX Notch will always be my favorite of them all(and also the lightest because racecar)

but I warming up to the idea of a Zephyr or Fairmont sleeper

Edmonton's fastest street car is an LSx Turbo Zephyr I've seen it in person and it's a thing of beauty.

Mr. Ontop, No Strokes, No Smokes...Goes Fast. > Rock Bottom 02/10/2015 at 15:37

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These cars have had my imagination lately.

Rock Bottom > Mr. Ontop, No Strokes, No Smokes...Goes Fast. 02/10/2015 at 16:02

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They can into LeMons, too!

George McNally > Rock Bottom 02/10/2015 at 17:25

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I bought a new 1980 Fairmont Futura in 1979.......had the 4 cylinder 2.3 and the manual 4 speed. I had no problem running 75 mph on the highway-of course it was running around 3500 RPM. Drove it for 8 years, put 80,000 miles on it and never spent a dime on repairs. When I traded it in on a 88 Tempo 4 door, I got 600 bucks for it.....it was completely used up.

Rock Bottom > George McNally 02/11/2015 at 12:55

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That sounds about right! I find it interesting that cars from that period (and earlier) were pretty much toast by 100,000 while you can expect a car today to run for 2 or 3 times that long with little trouble. I guess it's a sign of how far we've come in a fairly short time.

Also, how was the jump from Fairmont to Tempo?